“Self-love is not selfish; you cannot truly love another until you know how to love yourself.” – Unknown
Happy 2019! I know we’re well into March and this is my first blog post of the year. I’d normally feel bad about this, but if you follow me on Instagram you know I’ve been busy…busy working on loving myself more. But not just saying it; really meaning it. I’ve been reading, meditating, reflecting, journaling, dedicating more time and energy into my self-care routine…oh, and doing a “love detox.” (I’ve deleted all of the dating apps from my phone because I’m taking a break from dating altogether.)
The beginning of the year is when most of us are focused on creating goals for our lives, careers, relationships, etc. Whether it’s making a vision board or just a quiet promise to ourselves, many of us make a list of a bunch of things we want to accomplish over the course of the next 12 months. I do it too and my list is usually very, very long. But, 2019 is different. This year, I decided to just make one goal/commitment: to simply loving myself more.
I’ve grown a lot over the past few years, specifically in the acceptance of my body. That’s how I got here and why you’re here, too (whether you know it or not). I started The Chief of Style with the intention of loving every dimple, wrinkle, fat roll, stretch mark and pimple…all of the physical stuff I spent years hating about myself. I’ve come SO far in that journey, but I still have a ways to go when it comes to loving myself. Like, I know I’m great and all, but I keep letting users and abusers into my life and I’m finally over it! I’m done putting everyone else (like the people I’m romantically involved with, in particular) before myself (and even sometimes my closest friends and family). Love is blind in more ways than one and I’ve really let one too many jerks keep me from not only seeing my own worth, but how much other people I care about care about me.
So, I made the decision on Valentine’s Day to stop dating for a while. And, I mean it. I’m going to stop putting all of my love, time, energy and resources into other people (who haven’t even proven they deserve it) and put it into myself. I’m also taking the time to process and face my traumas instead of pretending they never happened. It’s honestly pretty intense and a little scary, but I feel quite certain I will come out this much happier and emotionally healthier and stronger.
Part of my plan for loving myself more is taking myself on dates, treating myself to trips to the spa and destinations near and far and spending more time alone – and enjoying it! I used to do everything for my partner, including wearing sexy lingerie. But, now I’m even doing that for myself.
One of my favorite sources for budget-friendly, flirty lingerie is Yandy. They have beautiful pieces in a wide range of sizes, including plus sizes. I’m absolutely in LOVE with this “Bad Intentions” lingerie gown. It has detachable straps and a high waist panty. Wearing lingerie just for me is officially part of my self-care practice.
If you’re curious about Yandy, you can use my promo code for 20% off: chiefofstyle20
I’m curious…how do you practice self-love? Let me know in the comments! I can’t wait to learn some new tips. 🙂
Thank you to Yandy for sponsoring this post. As always, all views expressed are my own, true opinions.